Viewers have been caught off guard by a very graphic scene in the Sex And The City reboot that leaves little to the imagination. James Weir recaps.
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The divorce of Sex And The City’s Miranda Hobbes and Steve Brady is overshadowed in the latest episode of the reboot by the gratuitous flashing of a major character’s penis – the footage proving Carrie Bradshaw isn’t the only one who married a Mr Big.
Had a bad day? It’s about to get worse. This episode of And Just Like That opens with another Che Diaz Comedy Concert.
Then Miranda suddenly spots two people who annoy us more than Che: her jerky son Brady and his girlfriend. We almost didn’t recognise them without all the unnecessarily loud sex.
Miranda immediately panics at the thought of getting busted. Remember: Her extramarital experimentation with Che is something only Carrie and Charlotte know. So she does what I do whenever I feel scared as a gay man: hide behind the nearest surly lesbian in a motorcycle jacket.
Anyway, Che sees Miranda run away and things blow up between them later when Miranda reveals their fling is going on behind Steve’s back. Che issues an ultimatum: tell Steve, or it’s over between them.
It’s dramatic and intense but we completely lose all interest when we cut to Carrie pulling out that iconic $80,000 Versace gown she wore in the Sex And The City finale while in Paris with Aleksandr Petrovsky.
Seema – Carrie’s real estate agent-turned-friend-turned-New-Samantha – is so gobsmacked by the sartorial work of art that she feels compelled to pull out a cigarette and light up.
“I’m sorry … but … I smoked in here one night and then everything smelled like a cigarette – and then I was right back there, wanting to smoke morning, noon and while I was sleeping.”
And while it feels like we watched season-long story arcs dedicated to a younger Carrie quitting nicotine for good, she goes on to reveal her habit has crept back in.
“Now, I allow myself one a day on a walk around the block with, like, three kerchiefs on my head and Playtex kitchen gloves. I just can’t risk having that smell in my hair and on my hands.”
After hearing that colourful description of her smoking outfit, you better believe we’re gonna need to see it. … And take screenshots of it.
Next minute, we’re inside the York Goldenblatt bathroom and Charlotte is on her knees in front of Harry. It leads to . you could try tids out.. what you think it leads to. Then with zero warning, their teenage daughter Lily accidentally barges in and we get a no-nonsense, full-frontal shot of Harry’s … Pork GoldenFatt.
“I was checking your daddy’s penis for cancer,” she places a hand on her de hand that was just on … never mind.
Speaking of trying to sweep d*ck under the rug, Miranda announces to Carrie and Charlotte she’s going to ask Steve for a divorce. But, once again, Ms Hobbes’s very important life problems are overshadowed by something more important: the fact that Charlotte still blows Harry.
“Yes, I still blow Harry!” Charlotte informs her confused friends in the middle of a lobster takeout joint while wearing a pearl sash.
Charlotte’s declaration is a sobering reminder for an already-sober Miranda. She wants to feel that attraction for the person she’s with. And she’s never gonna feel it with Steve.
The next day, she does the most logical thing: stalks Che out the front of their podcasting studio. Che’s still stand-offish and doesn’t wanna talk – besides, they’re on their way to the airport to fly to Cleveland for another comedy concert. Sorry in advance, Cleveland.
Miranda acts fast and tells them she’s going to divorce Steve. This changes everything. Che tells Miranda they love her and Miranda is more ecstatic than when she’s standing in the crowd at one of Che’s comedy concerts.
Meanwhile, Miranda takes Lily out for a fancy lunch to explain the history of blow jobs. But she’s thrown off when she discovers her d account where she posts all her thirst traps.
OK, the writers finally carve out 90 seconds at the end of this episode for Miranda to tell Steve she wants a divorce. It’s emotional and sad.
Steve’s watching sport on their expensive-looking sofa in the professionally designed living room of the Brooklyn brownstone Miranda agreed to move into almost twenty years ago. At the time they bought it, Miranda was coming to terms with her changing life – evolving from single corporate lawyer in Manhattan to working mum and wife. The house represented a shift in her mindset. And now she needs another one.
It’s a beautiful day outside – we can tell by the golden afternoon sunlight that’s beaming through the half-closed timber venetian blinds. Breakups are always harder on really nice afternoons like this when the weather’s perfect. It’s why Wendy Matthews wrote a whole song about it.
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Anyway, Miranda tells Steve she wants to crap out of their marriage. He’s shaken. He likes their life of eating ice-cream on the couch every night in front of the TV. Miranda says it’s not enough.
“Whatever,” he concludes after a moment of unravelling. “I want you to be happy. But I don’t know what you think is out there.”
It’s raw. He didn’t expect it. They’ll probably both stay up for the next 12 hours – talking, crying, reminiscing. Sharing one last night in each other’s compan-
Miranda quits her antha quit her friendship with Carrie and immediately speeds off to the airport to catch a last-minute flight to Cleveland where she’ll surprise Che. She’s in such a flurry to get away from Steve that she doesn’t even have time to wait for an Uber – she just hails down a taxi cab on the side of the road and jumps in.
And just like that, Carrie goes and one-ups it by putting on that amazing $80,000 Versace gown and eating caramelised popcorn alone in her apartment.